The Vain Story of Us

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                       THE VAIN STORY OF US

Once in a blue moon of the first comet above the constellation, there was a woman of unbreakable silence sitting on the rollercoaster journey of love. She experienced how it felt, she experienced how it works, how it should be, and how it is structured. But just like a rollercoaster ride, it was a love of sudden fluctuations and extreme changes.

“Hey! Friea who's this boy you flex on social media? He's so handsome, like argh! Where did you get that guy?!” Lexi asked Friea loudly as she tapped her shoulder on the way off to school.

“Gosh Lex, your hands are so heavy” Friea sarcastically replied and put Lexi's hand down.

“So, who's this guy, fri? Hahaha” Lex asked.

“Stop it Lex. He's just a random guy, you know” Friea replied, rolling her eyes.

“Gosh Friea, I know you. Stop lying, okay? See, you're blushing hahahaha” Lex replied.

Blushingly, Friea just answered and said 

“Okay, he's my boyfriend.”

“Really? Since when?” Lex asked surprisingly.

“ahm 15th of January? Yeah, 15th hahaha” Friea replied, looking at her phone's calendar.

“Whoa! So, you mean it's been 5 months since then?”

“why didn't you tell me sooner? Gosh Friea, I thought we were best friends?” sarcastically Lexi replied, sulkily, embracing her cuteness.

“'cause I know you'd tease me like you did. I know you would not believe it if I said so, knowing it's my first time entering a relationship”, Friea replied.

 “I'm sorry, okay? I promise from this day, I won't keep a secret. I'll tell you everything.” Friea smilingly added and making a pinky promise with Lexi.

Friea and Lexi are best friends. They've been friends for over 3 years. Their intimacy compares to no one as it is a real friendship that anyone wants to have. They're both at the age of 18. Friea is studying the stem strand while Lexi is on the abm strand. They're both grade 12 students at the same school. 

Friea is a girl that any guy dreams of having. Her beauty resides in the captivating scenery of constellations up there, where, even in the darkness, she shines brightly. Her brown eyes, pointed nose, and heart-shaped lips added to her features and her long-black hair embraced her simplicity yet elegance pulchritude, reflecting her inner side as if she's a lady of flowing pure water on a river. 

Meanwhile, Lexi is a short blonde girl with a not-so-generic beauty. Her uniqueness embraces her tough personality with a humor taste. She's a kind of girl that boys are afraid of, for she oftentimes get into fighting, knowing her short-temper as short as she is. Even so, she's still soft and kind. She just uses her tough personality as a defense mechanism to be independent, to protect herself, and her bestfriend.

“Fri, have you ever met that guy?” Lex asked of a sudden.

“ahm, not yet. I just met him on the internet. You know, something like ‘internet love’ hahahah” Friea laughingly replied.

“But he made a promise that when the perfect timing comes, we'd meet each other,” Friea added blushingly.

Friea's boyfriend, named Rael, whom she met on social media, is a man of girl's ideal. He's so soft and gentle that even the peaceful green leaves up there would fall for his words. Though the digital screen hinders his personal voice and attractive charisma, his personality and attitude still embraces sincerity and pureness. He's like a fictional character in a poetic mood in which his metaphoric words can set girl's standard so high.

“Ahm love, it's 15th of the month, right?” Rael chatted Friea on messenger.

“Yeah love, it's the 15th” Friea replied.

“Gosh! I almost forgot hahahah it's our 10th monthsarry!!” Friea added and greeted Rael.

“Since it's our day today, love, can we make a video call? I just wanted to see you.” Friea insisted.

“You know that I don't like it, right?” Rael replied softly.

“Don't worry love, when the time is right, I'll spoil you with my looks, personally. No more digital screen will hinder us.” Rael added smoothly, comforting Friea.

“I'm sorry,” Friea replied.

“Oh, don't be sorry. Anyway, I have a poem for you, love”

(lay down your head on my shoulder

And they will rest comfortably.

Harden not thy heart

Because of this peaceful scene, I imagine.

And I wish to take a picture out.

Close thy eyes and feel

The art of solace in being alone together.

Thy shall not neglect nor forbid.

Rather, listen to when it says

“You are my love, you are my home.”

Lay down your head on my shoulder

And thy will feel the tranquility.

Put away thy worries and burden in mind.

Leave the pain and sorrows carried in your heart.

Oh love, how I wish I could feel. 

The weight of thy head, 

How I wish I could caress your hair

When things feel not right. 

I wish everything I imagine.

Could truly happen)

Everything was going smooth and well with two love birds. Though sometimes they argue, they manage to fix it and be fine, as if they were early exposed to maturity.

But, everything changed after a quarter of a year. Rael begins to embrace his true color as if his love is being swayed by a hurricane of a sudden.

“Love, I really wanted to see you. I'll call you okay?” Friea chatted.

“Don't! I said that I don't like it", right? Gosh Friea, you're like a toddler who lacks apprehension! You're suffocating me as always!!” Rael replied, as if he was shouting.

With that, Friea started to doubt. Not just that, Rael is exposed to flirting with other girls. So Friea began crying often at night, as if she was always in the ocean of tears, and was carrying a heavy heart each day and as if her soul was being caged by unspoken words she wished to speak out. She think everything is in vain and messy. She couldn't even understand a thing. Only one thing she knows, she loves Rael as damn as much. That's why she tolerate his wrong doings even if it compresses his heart with pain.

She couldn't endure it all alone, so gloomily, Friea approached her best friend, Lexi, to have someone to comfort her. And as best of friends, Lexi quickly went to Friea's house.

“Lex, w-what should I do?” said Friea while crying. 

“Why, what happened Fri?” Lexi asked worryingly as she sat on the bed beside Friea.

“I don't know! I just can't understand everything! He was l-lying! H-he was cheating, but I can't afford to leave him!” Friea, crying out loud, messing her hair like insane.

“Huh? Tell me everything. Tell me exactly what happened” Lexi replied in curiosity, showing her empathy as she caressed Friea's hair.

“Rael c-changed. H-he's not the same guy I-knew before.” stammering Friea said while sobbing.

“I saw the conversation between him and a certain girl flirting with each other. I saw the conversation of his confession to that girl. And yeah, she's pretty. S-shes -prettier than me" Friea explained sobbingly.

“I tried to break up with him after I knew everything, but he ended up begging me not to leave him. And here I am, being such a stupid fool who can't leave him either. I always end up tolerating him because I love him so much. I just can't understand him, L-lex. He flirts, but he shows motive that he still loves me. He seems to have fallen out of love, but he still wants me to stay.” Friea added, sobbingly rubbing her chest as she couldn't breathe properly.

Out of nowhere, instead of giving advice, Lexi just cried and rushed out Friea's room. She sobbingly ran downstairs, leaving Friea clueless and in pain.

After Friea managed to calm herself, she stood out of bed to fix herself. She was about to go to the comfort room. But on the small table beside her bed, she saw Lexi's phone. It was left when she rushed of a sudden. She doubts Lexi, as if she's hiding a secret from her. So, her instinct drove her to open the phone, but she couldn't guess the pin. After so many attempts, it opened! She opened the facebook app and what she saw surprised her as if the clock stopped tickling, as if her world fell down to the ground.

“What?! It's Rael's account on Lexi's phone?! How? How could this be?! Does that mean Rael and Lexi are one?! Does that mean she's Rael's another girl?!” Friea uttered in her mind as she fell down to the floor, staggered and began tearing her eyes again.

She couldn't believe what she just found out. She couldn't understand a thing. She couldn't think properly, as if her soul died at a moment.

Suddenly, Lexi went back to pick up her phone. As she opened the door of Friea's room, she was shocked to see Friea messily on the floor holding her phone.

She trembled and knew nothing about what to do in the situation. She trembled and just cried.

“Explain this, Lex.” Friea said vapidly as she got up and showed the phone to Lexi.

“What's the meaning of this? Huh?” she added.

With tears in her eyes, Friea said, 

“Are you the flirty girl I'm referring to? That's why you ran suddenly earlier, huh?” 

“Or, does that mean Rael and you are one?”

Lexi just still trembles and says nothing while sobbing in silence.

“What the h*ll, lex! Speak up please! I'm so f*ckíng confused right now! Answer my question!!” Friea shouted and cried.

“I-m sorry, fri. Forgive me p-please” Lex uttered trembly as she approached to kneel down in front of Friea.

“I-I'm not Rael's another girl.” she added.

“If not, so you mean...?” Friea replied.

“Yeah, it's me fri, R-rael. Rael and I are no different but the same person”, lex sobbingly confessed.

“I'm sorry, fri. Please forgive me. I can't afford to ruin us. Please Friea, f-forgive me.” lex trembly begged.

Seriously, lex? You can't afford to ruin us? You can't afford to ruin us, yet you have already ruined my life! What the h*ll, lex! You broke my heart into pieces! No, not just my heart, you broke my whole life!! You ruin my dreams! You ruin everything, lex! How dare you play dumb on me?! How dare you play with my emotions?!” Friea shouted.

“Lex, we're best friends, right? But why?! The h*ll, lex! I was sincere! I was genuine! My intentions were pure, but how? How could you do this to me?!” Friea added and cried.

“I'm sorry, Fri. I'm sorry if I ruin your dreams. I'm sorry if I imitated your ideal guy. I'm sorry if I made you suffer too much. I'm sorry if I hurt you too much. Forgive me p-please” she again begged.

“So, why? Why did you do that? Just answer the question pleaaasee!!” Friea shouted again.

....

“Because...because I love you. I love you, Fri. Not just a friend, but a romantic affection. I love you, but I don't have the courage to pursue you as Lexi. I love you and I don't want you to be with someone else.” Lex sobbingly explained.

Lexi's words leave Friea speechless for a moment.

“That's not love, it's selfishness,” Friea said looking directly at lexi's eye.

“Get out, please” she added, pointing at the door.

“Fri....” lex approaches Friea's hand.

“I said get out!! Get out lex! Geeet oout!!” Friea shouted, approaching Lexi off to the room and closing the door harshly.

......

Just like that, their friendship was over. Their relationship led to never again. Just like a rollercoaster, their journey of love was quick and deep. Their vain story of love was like just a dream of one thousand hours' sleep. A dream which turns out to be a nightmare.

Months had passed, Friea was still in the process of healing—healing the wounds of her heart. In the process of freeing—freeing her soul from the cage of pain. She practiced the art of being alone as she cut off her connection with Lexi. She now focuses on studying, on improving herself, on loving herself more, for she realizes that, at the end of the day, she only have herself. Her vain journey of love makes her more stronger, independent, and wise.

—THE END—

“Don’t fall for words, anything in this world can be imitated.”

“Never trust quickly, never believe easily; everything is breakable.”

                                        @bleeding_ink